Now Panic and Freak Out

So, in the last blog post I wrote, I believe I panicked--nay, I'd say flipped out a bit (went bat...you know...crazy?), about my current financial situation, specifically in regards to what I decided was a ticking timebomb of a car.

That car. Look. There's me. What an embarrassing picture.

Two days after I wrote my last post, whining and crying and asking you all why God hadn't provided for me yet, I found out that my car, in fact, is just fine, and that burning stench I've been smelling is actually a plastic bag that melted to the outside of my exhaust pipe.  

So...I probably didn't need to go losing my crap the way I did. I got the call that my car was just dandy and that they weren't going to charge me any diagnostic fees while I was at my sister's house with my entire family, and the amount of stupid happy dancing I did is the kind of thing that shouldn't really be discussed any further. But I am thankful that God in His great mercy, spared me from this round of financial mayhem. 

Amen.

The List

I'm working on tithing these days. Normally I suck at it. Between changing jobs four times in three years, moving four times, and attending three different churches, I haven't had a ton of consistency in my life. Normalcy isn't really something I have any sort of grasp on.

Last month my pastor preached a sermon on tithing that reminded me that 1) I owe the church about $1,000,000,000,000,000 in back-tithes, and 2) I have been choosing comfort over trust in God for...well really, for forever. That extra money has helped me buy groceries and paid for bills, sure, but more than not, it's been wasted on $4 soy lattes from Starbucks and yet another pair of skinny jeans that I don't really need, even if they are ridiculously on sale. My lack of tithing skills has translated over to a lack of saving skills, too, so at the end of every two weeks, I find myself praying to Jesus that there won't be any sort disasters that will require me to pull the last $32 out of my checking account. Over the past year I've sold clothes and books, I've freelanced, I've panicked, and in a few of my least proud moments, I've called my parents and very awkwardly and embarrassingly asked them for help when I haven't been able to meet my own meager needs. It's not a pretty way to live.

Listening to this sermon was a reminder that I need to put God in charge of my finances, not just the vague areas in which I like to say I give him in control. I need to legitimately put my money where my mouth is, as crappy and painful as that may seem.

Pity Party

My life is punching me in the face. 

Today, I read something in the news about a really great Christian guy I used to be friends with. He was recently charged with trying to have inappropriate relations with one of his students. I knew this guy--he was that guy who would say hi to me and I'd blush and get all stupid and announce to my friends that he was the sweetest guy I knew, and that any girl would be lucky to have him. And now I'm straight up in shock. We're all one step from falling. But it breaks my heart.

I talked to a my friend Cory at work about it, and he told me that all guys are disgusting perverts. 

This did not make me feel better. 

Especially because...

Thursday Mornings

Every Thursday morning at work I spend fifteen minutes covering the front desk for our receptionist. I pretend I'm Pam Beesly. (Duh.) And eat copious amounts of Laffy Taffys from the front desk candy bowl while reading some of my favorite blogs.

So I thought I'd share:

http://www.runningoffthereeses.com/ - because I laugh so hard I snort

http://www.theveryworstmissionary.com/ - because I want to be this woman

http://www.girlversusdough.com/ - because she's my bestie

http://www.littlemissmomma.com/ - because sometimes there's nothing better than pining after someone else's perfect little life

And that is all I have today.

resolutions

I have decided to become a money saving, budget-making hosebeast.

So we'll see how that goes.

i am the youngest

And once again, I will be contributing SALAD to Thanksgiving dinner.

25

I have been a sucky blogger. I started this blog after deleting my old one a month ago, and that weekend I wrote several posts. Since then, I've thought about writing on my blog the same way I think about paying my ComEd bill early. I'll get around to it when it's necessary.

Only, the thing about writing is that it's not necessary. It's completely selfish and 100% personal. It's something I care about more than I can fully explain; a way for me to process life and create with the medium I love most: words.